Posted in Zafu #LifeBeyondStigma

Best Birthday Gift for a writer

Today is my Birthday and my life partner gifted me a cake mentioning achievements of my blog from past one year, and two books on the side from the best authors of writing to read, learn and improve more in writing skills which are motivating me to take resolution of writing more, expressing more and utilizing the canvas of blog for painting my thoughts and spreading the word.

Thanks Hubby 😍😍

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Posted in Motivation, poetry, Quote, Zafu #LifeBeyondStigma

Myths and facts of Feminism

  

 

Feminism is  a fight against men ;

No it’s a fight against patriarchal and dominating thoughts ,

Feminism is  a fight against freedom gifted to men;

No it’s a fight against inequality between freedom of men and women,

Feminism is  a fight against the strength that a man’s body can have ;

No it’s a fight against the body shaming that only women face,

Feminism is a fight against marrying a successful man ;

No it’s a fight against repudiation of  high pay in case of woman

Feminism is a fight against customs and traditions of arrange marriage;

No it’s a fight against perfectly inelastic demand curve  set for a gender’s family.

Feminism is not fight against men, it’s a fight against thoughts.

Posted in Motivation, Zafu #LifeBeyondStigma

Seven steps for remaining strong and getting over from break up

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Yes I am flustered…………………………….

Relationships are made for living happily with a person whom you love the most.But what if those relations become complicated ?? What if  threads of trust in relationship get break ?? or What if  the other person has taken you for granted ? I think in all such cases the answer would be it’s better to get rid from such relationship,Right ??But it’s not that easy to detach the strings of emotional connection .That’s why phase of breakup become difficult to bear and mostly people go through depression . So it won’t be a great suggestion if I would say once you breakup forget everything in a second.But yes there are few steps which may help in self – recovery :

  1. Don’t make alcohol your best friend : Not every but mostly  men and women choose this ubiquitous path of DevD so that they may sleep well ,could easily forget the person and pain of relationship. But that doesn’t happen ,instead this way may make you lost deep in black hole from which you wanted to come out.

        When you are happy consuming alcohol might be fun but when you are sad ,it becomes addiction.

2. Don’t hesitate in asking for help because your life is important : If you don’t have any trustworthy friend or family person with whom you may share about your circumstances to come out from the situation, take the help of Counselors .I know there is societal stigma attached with it as mostly people think that a person only take help of Wellness coaches and Psychologists when they go through some sort of mental disorder.But it’s not true  . This phase is so sensitive that one should take care of his /her mental health along with physical wellbeing with positive attitude and thanks to technology as there are many AI platforms in mental health care where one can take help online in an anonymous way too.

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3.Go for a trip and plan for some adventurous activities: Try to change your surroundings by planning a trip with your friends or family . If you like traveling this is best naturopathy to make yourself feel better.

4.Join some activity classes for leisure  : Yoga is the best therapy for maintaining physical and mental wellbeing at a time , apart from this one can join activities like swimming, dance and music to relax mood and sustaining the inner confidence.

It is said that when people feel good about their physique, they become  more confident about themselves too.

5. Focus on your long term goals : You might have made some long term goals with the person who is not in your life anymore but that doesn’t mean that your other goals have been devastated too.This is the time when you can focus more on your career and may become legend  or may give your precious time to those people who are always standing behind you ,no matter what.

6.Not every breakup become the end of story : This point is very important because it is not necessary that if you have been through break up in your relationship once, you can’t patch up.If the duo of a love story are really connected with each other but they break up due to family issues or some ego factor , then they need to stand strong with each other forgetting the ego because if they are together then no one can come between them.

7.Forget the bitter moments of past from your life by flushing them off  from your mind and forgive people for the sake of treasuring the sweet moments .

Thank you for reading !!

Sometimes it’s important to let go the wrong person so that the right one may come in your life at the right time……

Posted in Zafu #LifeBeyondStigma

Four tips you should follow if you lack lucidity in verbal communication

 

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Have you ever encountered  problem of lucidity while communicating with other people either at work place or in social circle who misunderstood your point most of the time because you were unable to express yourself  precisely and so every time after such conversation you felt disappointed ?? If yes then you would be always thinking that what  should be the solution.Well, there are few easy tips which can be followed :

1.Don’t stop explaining :

When ever you get trapped in such conversations and presentations , don’t lose hope .If people doesn’t get your point at very first time, be patient and explain it again rather than leaving conversation in between.

2. Observe the bottle neck points :

Every time when you go through such circumstances ,observe the bottle neck points.For example if you are experiencing problem in explaining to your Boss what you did in your project , even after knowing the answer then next time write down all the points of problems you faced in your explanation and try to find whether it’s because of the language or due to lack of knowledge, solve it accordingly and rehearse before the next discussion with your Boss.

3. Take stand for yourself :

If some one try to impose their thinking on you because they think you don’t have a valid point to explain ,don’t worry, if you know why you are right ,stick to your point without hesitating and if you know there is a flaw, accept that too because you don’t need to win every conversation . For  example if some one ask you why you are still not married even at the age of 30 which is very late as per the other person then explain them that you know that you have the right to chose the path of your life rather than following standard bar of getting married before thirty even if they say you should do it.

4. Talk less ,listen more :

Most of times we couldn’t give the right answer because of lack of clarity in knowledge about the topic . So talk less ,listen more  and react accordingly .

Let me know what you think could be done more, if a person faces hurdle in putting their point forward while conversing.

Hey Fellas, Hope you all are doing well . I came on WP after a break and I was missing my interaction with you all as blogging became an important part of my life.

So thanks for being connected and keep smiling.

Posted in Zafu #LifeBeyondStigma

Schools are no more “Temples of Education”

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“ Since the time Rubina started going to new school, she ain’t enjoying her school days and most of the time make excuses for staying at home.I am afraid, what could be reason of this drastic change ? ”,her mother told to her neighbour, whom daughter Neha is Rubina’s classmate.

“My daughter also told me that Rubina doesn’t talk  much in class and  teachers insulted her sometimes for not doing home work and clam up in class, probably this could be the reason of the excuses she make, for not going to school.”

“But at least she should be interested in making new friends ,even Neha ain’t her friend.Doesn’t Neha like her company ?? ”

“Sorry ,I have never conversed about it with Neha ,so I can’t say.But you can directly question her.”

“Yeah I need to find out solution of this puzzle .”

Suddenly the bell rang ……

“Ah ! Someone is there at the door,I think it must be Neha. I will just come.”

“Yeah Sure”

“Hey Mom ,Why you took so much time in opening door ??” Neha asked to her mother.

“Beta, I was just talking to Meeta Aunty (Rubina’s Mom).She is here. Go and meet her,I will bring you juice.”

“Hi Aunty,How are you ?? ”

“I am good beta, how are you ? How is your school going ?”

“I am fine Aunty and school is  phenomenal.”

“Seems you enjoy a lot in school.”

“Yeah Aunty,I really love going to school.I am favourite of many teachers and have really great friends in school.”

“Oh !! That’s sounds so perplexing.”

“ Why Aunty ?? ”

“Because none of this is happening with Rubina, that’s the reason beta, I am sitting here.Can you tell me why Rubina feel so isolated in school that she doesn’t enjoy spending time in school ??”

“Aunty as far I know, nobody wants to talk to her in class.”

“Why??” ( Meeta was stopped dead after listening this )

“Because most of the time she doesn’t clam up when teachers ask her something.The only subject she love is Arts.So other subject teachers ordered the class mates to be at daggers drawn with her. ”

“What ?? This is happening with her and she never told me about it. How teachers can teach children such act of forbidding ?? I need to talk with the Principal about it.

Thanks for your help Beta.”

“No problem Aunty but I think it’s Rubina’s fault as she is not concentrating on her studies and so teachers don’t like her.

Neha’s mom stared at her , gesturing for not behaving this way.But she ignored.

And I have also heard from class mates that Rubina belongs to poor family and that’s why she is like this.”

“What ? ? Oh My God !! Is that also the point to consider ?? Neha beta I don’t know whether you will get my point or not, but it could be vice-versa.May be she don’t like her teachers and that’s why she don’t focus on other subjects apart from arts.Since the ancient ages ,teachers had the history of being partial on the basis of background of children, so why can’t they would be now (crying on her daughter’s ordeal )”

Rubina’ s father was a Farmer and  he wanted his daughter to be in top school of the city so that she may receive quality education and reach at a level where they couldn’t but little did they know that schools also judge students on basis of father’s occupation.

I agree with the fact that competition should be there in schools, but what kind of competition is this, where a child become a loser, in judgement  of other people on the basis of family background ??

Why teachers can’t treat every child equally ,irrespective of whether student is concentrating /not concentrating on studies ? Isn’t their responsibility to check what’s wrong with the child and how they can improve, rather than just giving the punishment of isolation ??

It is always said that, “schools days are best ”.But  it’s a wrong statement for those children who doesn’t get a  second chance ,when they remain unable to prove themselves in first round.

This is the reason why children come under stress and anxiety at such a age when they  should live their life care free.

 

This  is the first time I am penning down a tale, inspired by true events.Thanks for reading and please share your feedback.Your feedback will help me to improve and ink more quality work for you.

Posted in Zafu #LifeBeyondStigma

Not Introvert but Sociophobic

  

She has many friends to tell her about their happiness , but when ever she get sad she can’t share her feelings because of fear of getting misjudged. She doesn’t want to go to social gatherings  because of the fear of getting hurt and embarrassed. She doesn’t want to hang out with friends because  her counter point may  get her remarked as arguable person and now she is not confident anymore when  surrounded by people.

Why this phobia happened ?

 She felt  that whenever she has tried to get close with any of her friends ,they mocked her by telling about ambiguity of her talks which hurted her. When she tried to enjoy in a function people just commented on her appearance and how she behaved over excitededly. When ever she expressed her opinion either people had thrown their tantrums  telling that  her opinion is absurd or just tried to impose their opinions on her.

So now a question arises ?  Who is responsible for her Sociophobic condition ?

Either she or society …..

Does anybody have the answer ??????

 Criticism of being natural generates phobia of being social…..

This post is not any gender specific ,it’s just explained by an instance.

So if you have any such friends , don’t make them feel awkward as each of us have some nuisance inside , just try to understand such people and you may get a best friend in them.

© Payal Tyagi

Posted in Zafu #LifeBeyondStigma

Anxiety or Intuition

Her heart was crying

making her eyes wet

and she didn’t know the reason

of  such deep pain inside….

Was this an anxiety or a bad intuition, does anybody  have the answer ??

 

Thanks for reading and never let your smile fall off from your face.

I will miss you guys and will come back with a new travel story.

Posted in Zafu #LifeBeyondStigma

Scars can’t be mend

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Love was immense when it started between them,

entirely sweet and magical ;

soon it turned abusive and dominant,

and  she started frightening with his actions,

thought  parting of their ways ;

But this hurted his ego , he decided to take revenge,

and  it all just ended with her burnt face.

 

Don’t force anyone to love you ,love is a blessing  and if some one has cheated on you just remember revenge is not the solution as Karma comes back, says the law of universe.

~Payal Tyagi

Posted in Motivation, Zafu #LifeBeyondStigma

Working woman or Homemaker : Both are worth praising

” Dear daughter , I want you to become a working woman and be independent because a home maker like me who don’t earn money , always get in ears a word called liability ” , a mother said to her daughter.

” Mom , the hard work that you had put in our upbringing and making this home beautiful is no where less than the effort I will put after being a working women or Papa had put in to make our life comfortable and the words you have heard were because of patriarchal thinking  and you know what , you can start  earning now as well  ” , daughter said.

” But my time has gone and I can’t work for someone at this age “, mother said.

” Mom, age is just a number , it’s time to give exposure to your talent of creativity  which is not at all difficult in this world of internet  “,  her daughter said.

Thanks for reading and never let smile fall off from your face .

© Payal Tyagi